Carbon Dioxide has been the hot topic for the last couple of years thanks to Tennessee's own Al Gore. You've heard of Global Warming, now Climate Change, and the affects of CO2 on our planet. Right?
Well, this has trickled into every aspect of our earth and though the issues have toned down lately it certainly does come up every once in a while and really strikes a nerve within my very sensitive body. Why? I don't know. It just seems that CO2 is so......................natural. I breath it out everyday, quite a bit. Generally in the form of hot air.
Caveat to the Hippies, earthy people, environmentalists, hippies, democrats, republicans, independents, and others who are for or against this topic. : I certainly want a clean earth, water, air, etc.
But truly, I can make an argument for anything? Like saying that an increase in tornadoes is directly related to the decrease of CO2 we've experienced. Don't think I can argue that? Ha!
Al Gore starting pushing the whole Global Warming/CO2 thing around 2005. His movie, The Inconvenient Truth was released in 2006, when there were approximately 1,106 tornadoes confirmed in the US. with 2007 having 1,092 while things were catching on and Al Gore won the Nobel Peace Prize.
Oh, but wait. Look what happens in the following years:
2008 - 1,691 Tornadoes confirmed
2009 - 1,156 Tornadoes confirmed
2010 - 1,266 Tornadoes confirmed
2011 - 1,688 Tornadoes confirmed
It increased significantly, though not consistently from 2006-2007, but I can eliminate the years I don't want. Isn't that what you do?
My next argument is that Oxygen created the mortgage crisis. Really......How? Well, back in the early 2000s until around 2007 all you had to do was breath on a mirror to get a loan. So basically, if you couldn't afford the loan but you could create fog on a mirror you got the loan through creative financing.
So how do you solve that problem. Well, I have created a plan known as an Oxygen Mapping System. If you breath in oxygen you need to pay me $10 per oxygen share to breath in. One share equals 12 hours oxygen time. Then you pay Al Gore to breath out (CO2). I will then need to be notified where you are going by providing an electronic map of your stops. If you make a wrong turn, or stop somewhere not on the map, I can then charge you triple for the oxygen. This will provide us with a safer environment as I can make sure you don't go and do something stupid like get a payday loan, go to the liquor store with your welfare check, or cheat on your spouse. It will also decrease the amount of oxygen, or air, that your car breathes in and the amount of CO2 it discharges, or breathes out. This is purely optional, of course.
Why do this? Well, we will have to re-balance the amount of CO2 and Oxygen. The only way to do it is to control you and make you believe this.
My Nobel Prize Please!!! and lots of money. $1,0000,000 was it? Large bills please.
If it all works out right my net worth will be $100,000,000 more than it is now. Worked for Al Gore. My understanding is he was worth about $2,000,000 before this whole Carbon Dioxide/Global Warming/Climate Change thing. Now he is somewhere in the neighborhood of $100,000,000.............NET!
